Okay, that's a lie. 3 cents is not really why I write this blog. But the rest is true.
1
So, I have this... trouble. I have "shy bowels." I don't poo in public restrooms. It's not that I don't want to, it's that I can't. Which made summer camp really fun as a kid.
Well, and it's not limited to public restrooms. I didn't go #2 in Zeke's folks' house until we'd been married for 19 months (and yes, I remember the exact number of months. It was a little traumatic.)
It's gotten better over the years, but not much better. I can now poo in gas station restrooms, but only while texting or playing phone games or reading something. But still, it's a bit of an issue.
Feel like you've now learned way more about me than you ever wanted to?
You're welcome.
Anyway. Solution? (Well, my problem is a little more complicated than just smell, but this will help. I just know it.)
It's gotten better over the years, but not much better. I can now poo in gas station restrooms, but only while texting or playing phone games or reading something. But still, it's a bit of an issue.
Feel like you've now learned way more about me than you ever wanted to?
You're welcome.
Anyway. Solution? (Well, my problem is a little more complicated than just smell, but this will help. I just know it.)
Apparently, you "Spritz the Bowl Before You Go and No One Else Will Ever Know." So your poo will literally smell like lavender. What? I know.
2
I pulled all the cushion covers out of our new camper (and I say "new" meaning "from the early 1980's, making it older than either one of us, but new to us") to wash them and then hang them to dry... and lo and behold, rain.
What's a girl to do?
Well, you could either get one of these...
...or, you could just set up a gorgeous cross-living-room laundry line system. You know. Whatever you prefer, really.
3
I've never really liked just biting into an apple. The juice goes all over your face... ugh. Not for me.
I typically cut my apples before I eat them. Time consuming, yes. But totally worth it.
Even more worth it with something as awesome as this...
I have a thing for turtles.
4
Throughout my childhood and young pre-married adulthood, I thought I would marry a businessman. Like my dad. He'd wear suits to work, or on Fridays, a blazer and jeans. And he'd carry a briefcase and get a tie for Christmas and his birthday every year, just like my dad. Because isn't that what all kids think- that they'll marry someone a little like their dad?
Cut to me marrying a man who's a full foot taller than my father, I've only seen him in a suit at weddings and funerals, and he carries this to work with him, not a briefcase.
So what do you get a guy like that for his birthday? I've only seen him wear a tie three times ever!
Solution?
This. Every birthday, and every Christmas. Because two in the lake and one under a building somewhere.
5
After a long day at work (long, long, long! This week has been a little nuts), the best solution is a little of this...
and money really can't buy something like that.
Even if I'd earn 3 cents if you did buy it.
Have a great weekend, all!
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