The Nitty- FAM and Me Thus Far

So, I started writing about why I ditched birth control the other day. We're on cycle 3 of all charting, no horrible artificial hormones! It's really been a learning experience, and I thought I'd share a little more about some of the stuff I've learned, how it's going, and the more logistical side of practicing the Fertility Awareness Method.

1. Get a system
One of the most important steps for me was wading through the many, many choices of how and where to chart. I use the sympto-thermal method, which means I record my temperatures and my cervical fluid. I knew from the get-go that I wanted to use a paper chart, simply because I could record my BBT (basal body temperature) right away in the morning and not worry about forgetting to put it online, and also because I figured, I'm going lower-tech for birth control, why not go low-tech for charting?

I learned pretty quickly that, as nice as paper charting is, I had some issues with remembering what my cervical fluid was like by the end of the day, and that I wanted quick and easy confirmation of what I was experiencing. I solved the first issue through my handy Daily Do's planner, where I write down all the details. I also chose to chart online using the Taking Charge of Your Fertility's online charting option, simply because I can share my charts with other people and ask for help very easily. As an added bonus, Zeke got an Ipod Touch through work, and so I downloaded the Kindara App (the free one) to use when we're not at home.

So yeah, right now I'm charting three times over, which admittedly is a little bit of overkill, but it's what's working for me right now. Which leads me to my second point...

2. Figure out what works for you
Some of the adjustments you have to make to use FAM include  taking your temperature at the same time every day, checking cervical fluid, and checking cervix position. Well... I learned pretty quickly that I don't like checking my cervix- I feel like I'm way too inexperienced with feeling around all up there to be an objective judge of how my cervix is doing. I just never really seemed to know what I was feeling for. Maybe I'll try using this fertility sign again after a few months.

I found that taking my temperature when I wake up in the morning was hard for me. I kept falling back to sleep after taking my temp, and that's no good when you've gotta get to work! Instead, I set an alarm to get me up at 5:30 every morning, wake up and pop a thermometer in my mouth, wait for the beep, and then fall back asleep. When I do finally get up, then I record my temperature. Making it 5:30 also means that if I have to get up super early for whatever reason (which does sometimes happen), I'm okay.

Then it came to checking my cervical fluid....

3. Take a deep breath and just stinking do it.
After being told throughout most of my young adolescence that cervical fluid was gross, unnatural, and subsequentially being embarrassed and grossed out by it, I was worried that checking this particular fertility sign wasn't gonna be pleasant. But you know what? It's my body. It's real and natural and me. So I just got over it. I started checking cervical fluid externally, but I found that I'm not a good judge of that, so I use internal checks instead.

My first cycle, the cervical fluid I had was confusing. Some days it would be sorta sticky, others sorta creamy, and never eggwhite. I was worried that this non-pattern of cervical fluid meant that I wasn't "doing it right"  or that I'd never get the hang of it. Turns out, I was just being overdramatic. My second cycle made much more sense when it came to cervical fluid. Coming off the Pill might mess with a woman's CF, like it did mine- just hang in there!

And you know what? It's not even a little bit gross to me anymore.


4. Be ready to get pissed.
Excuse the impolite language.

This was one part I wasn't anticipating. I see commercials for IUD's and I think, "Why? Why would this woman harm her body, open herself up to infections, and potentially sacrifice her fertility? DON'T DO IT, COMMERCIAL LADY! Chart instead!"

Or when I hear someone saying that birth control has liberated women- What? WHAT?! How is chaining yourself to artificial chemicals freeing? How is sacrificing your health a liberation?

Or when I read about the Yaz lawsuit- Seriously. These drugs are killing women. Killing them. We frown on putting hormones in our chicken (and no studies have shown that chickens pumped with hormones are deadly as of the time being), but we put them in our bodies every day, knowing full well that they can cause strokes, heart attacks, and cancer? Grr!

Or even when I hear other women talking about fertility, and realizing that these smart, well-educated women have no idea what they're talking about. Like my friend who hasn't exercised in months because she's trying to conceive and "you never know." Well, if she knew how to check her fertility signs, she'd realize when there's no chance that she's pregnant, and when she needs to be more cautious regarding her pretty strenuous exercise routine.

Even more so, I find myself wondering, why didn't I learn any of this? Why wasn't this important, empowering information provided in sex-ed class in school?

Using FAM has taught me so much- I would really recommend that all women learn more about their own bodies and become more informed about the choices we make about our health and well-being!

Why I Said Goodbye to Birth Control Pills

Disclaimer- this post may be a little TMI (too much information) for some. If so, click away now!

Another disclaimer- I'm still learning this stuff. I strongly suggest that if you're interested in this method of avoiding pregnancy, that you do your research! I know I did!

Source

Three months ago today, I took my very last birth control pill. No, there is no Hunky/Little Offspring in the plans. No, we're not crazy. We're using FAM.

A little background info-

I've been on birth control since I started college... so.... 7 years. My mom told me she thought it would be a good idea- that it would help regulate my periods and clear up my acne. I'd always had pretty regular periods, but I liked the idea of starting fresh in college without zits.

During those college years, I was pretty stretched for cash, so I had to prioritize my budget. First on the list was birth control, followed by food. I was a dedicated pill user. I had alarms on my phone to remind me. I carried an extra pill pack in my purse in case I forgot to take a pill and I remembered when I was out and about. I really liked knowing exactly when my period would arrive, the fact that my embarrassing zits cleared up, and frankly, that I was doing what all responsible grown-up women do.

I never had any side very noticeable side effects. Sure, I gained some weight, but almost everyone does in college- I attribute putting on the pounds more to the ice cream machine in the dining hall than the Pill. However, I did see some of my close friends experience side effects. One friend was taking a version of Yaz and had terrible mood swings that left her feeling powerless and a little crazy. She switched pills and the side effects went away. Just one of those crazy things, I thought.

After Zeke and I got married, I continued using the Pill to regulate my period and to avoid pregnancy early in our marriage. Now that I was sexually active, though, I started paying more attention to the signals my body was sending just in case, on the off chance, I did get pregnant while on the Pill. Paying closer attention to my body made me realize a couple of things.

First, I noticed that I got headaches before and after every period. Secondly, I noticed that while my periods were never very long, I always had lingering spotting for a couple of days afterward, something I didn't remember having happened before I was on the Pill. And thirdly, I realized that my sex drive was super low (which I didn't know before getting married, anyways).

With my new health insurance, though, the Pill was free. And everybody takes the Pill, right? The other options were an IUD or condoms, so I thought.

Still, I didn't like the very minor side effects I was recognizing, and I also didn't like the fact that I was forcing my body into a pattern other than the natural and normal pattern God gave me. I started finding information about natural birth control, and came across several bloggers who use the Fertility Awareness Method (FAM) or Natural Family Planning (NFP). I talked to Zeke about it. He told me that he wanted me to be healthy, but wasn't so sure about FAM. Sounded risky.

So I did more research. I was really surprised by some of the information I found, like that the "yucky discharge" I found in my panties as a teenager was natural, normal, and was able to tell me a lot about myself. I found research that showed that the Pill is a cause of cancer, that the Pill ages the cervix twice as fast, that the Pill can act as an abortifacient. I learned that FAM has been used for years and years, that it's scientifically accurate, and that if it's used correctly, it can prevent pregnancy 99% of the time.

I bought the book Taking Charge of Your Fertility, read it cover to cover and then again, and then decided to start charting. I talked to Zeke again... and he read TCOYF and made faces about some of the pictures... and agreed that we could do it. I practiced charting my Basal Body Temperature (BBT) and checking my cervical fluid, and when I had taken my last pill for that cycle, I didn't refill my prescription. I kissed birth control goodbye.

See another post here about our FAM journey!

Changing Directions

These past few weeks, I've been in the process of changing directions.

I've been walking down the path toward teaching for years now. I've gone to school, gotten my license, been a SPED aide, taken more classes, subbed, gotten another license, long-term subbed...

But now I'm changing directions.

As I began to realize that a full-time job wasn't going to happen for this fall, actually, the night I wrote this post, Zeke came home with news- the registrar for the Bible camp had taken another position and was leaving. I was sad to hear the news- our registrar was an integral part of our camp family.

I took a job at camp working at the front desk for the summer. I got to know the registrar even better, helped her with different things as she prepared to leave... and found that I kind of liked her job.

After a lot of prayer and after talking about it incessantly to Zeke as he tried to shower in peace, I applied for the registrar job.

I'll start my first day as camp registrar this week. It's definitely not what I expected to be doing, but so far, I've enjoyed it. Switching gears, changing directions. Still walking in the path laid out for me.

Keeping the Home Fires Burning

Life rarely follows a strict schedule, but most of the time, if we're lucky, our work lives do. Of course, those who work at Bible Camps are not included in that group of lucky ones. My Hunky Husband, as you know if you've been here for very long, is the Director of Maintenance at a Bible camp. We also live on site, which makes for an interesting lifestyle, to say the least- but that's a whole other post.

Many of you ladies (and maybe gentlemen) out there have the same trouble I do- when is your beloved coming home? You have no idea. Some nights, it'll be 4:30 pm (very, very rarely). Some nights, like tonight, it's more like... 12:39 am. Exactly 12:39 am, to be precise.

How do you deal?

Here are a three things I've learned over the past few months.

Source

1. Have a life. 
One thing I've struggled with these past few months is that without my husband, who happens to be my best friend... well, I get bored! I have much more fun doing anything and everything when he's around. Of course, that also makes it tough when he can't be around. Instead of pining and whining, I've learned to make it a point to have a plan for the evenings when he can't get home. I cut out quilt squares, call a good friend, clean the seals on the refrigerator door (yes, that), do a workout DVD, give myself a pedicure... as long as I stay busy with something that I want to do, I find that the time we're apart goes more quickly, and I'm in a much better mood when he does get home.

2. Understand the mission. 
Zeke isn't really a maintenance guy. Okay, he is a maintenance guy, but that's just one small part of his job. He's really a missionary- serving others for the glory of God. Keeping that mission in the forefront gives me a much healthier frame of mind toward the times when he does have to work late hours. That mission is going to be different in different situations. A computer tech working in the secular world will have a much different mission than a pastor, but it's a mission just the same. We want our husbands to be men of integrity who show the people around them what the love of Jesus looks like, whether it's "technically" a ministry position or not. 

3. Practice an attitude of service. 
When my Hunky Husband comes home after a long day, I know that he'll be tired. Sometimes he's crabby or disappointed. Sometimes he hasn't eaten all day. Most of the time, he's sore. Keeping those things in mind, I like to try to meet those needs in advance- by doing something nice for him, taking care of a task that's usually something he'd have to do, and having some kind of quick and easy food in the house. When I do something to make Zeke's life a little easier, it works into #2- my attitude becomes that I'm a part of that same mission, part of the team.

What do you do to keep the home fires burning?

 

... And I'm Never Getting a Job in this District...

Friday was last day of school for my senior students. They were excited, a little nervous, and ever so ready to be done. So, so ready. In fact, my Speech class finished giving their final speeches on Thursday, and asked if I was bringing treats on Friday. And could we eat them outside? If it was nice? Please!? It was their last day! I said sure, and made a mental note to make brownies for my Speech class of 15 teenage boys. Lots of brownies.

Friday rolled around, the brownies were safely stashed behind my desk, and it was nice out- nice enough to grant my gentlemen's wish of going outside for Speech class seventh hour.

Second hour- one of my students brings in hot dog buns and "Mrs. Adrie, could you put these behind your desk, too?" Umm, sure.

Fifth hour- one of my students waltzes in with charcoal and a bottle of lighter fluid. "Mrs. Adrie, where can I put these?" I begin to realize that this whole "going outside and bringing treats" thing has gotten a little out of hand.

Seventh hour- I take attendance of a group of buzzing 18-year-old boys. "We borrowed the FFA grill! Let's go outside!" Oh boy.

They had planned and executed a tail gate party in the parking lot. The grill was going, the hot dogs were sizzling, and they had seriously thought of everything. Napkins, paper plates, condiments, a cooler with cans of Coke sitting in ice. I was, to say the least, very impressed. They can't remember to bring their homework, but this? This they've got down.

The hour winds down, and I've got a class to teach 8th hour. I start them cleaning up, and ask what the shop teacher said about cleaning up the grill.

"Oh, I've got it," says a confident young man. He sounds like he's talked to the shop teacher.  Okay then. He's an adult now, anyways. He can handle it. And the shop teacher wouldn't have let them use the grill if he didn't trust them.

I head back into the building with the majority of the class, say goodbye to my senior students. Eighth hour begins, I start teaching.

One of my daydreaming students, looking out the window, says absentmindedly, "The garbage is on fire."

"What?"

"The dumpster. It's on fire."

"No, it's... Oh. Yes it is."

The dumpster, the big one by the school wood shop, is completely engulfed in flame. I call down to the office to let them know. She makes an all-school announcement that the dumpster is on fire. The students are now plastered against the windows, watching as the custodian douses the flames, looking, as the principal said, "like a Russian orphanage."

All I could think was, "Oh no. The grill." And I was right. The student who so confidently told me he was in charge of caring for the grill apparently shoveled the hot coals into the dumpster for the wood shop, setting wood scraps and sawdust ablaze.

And that's why I'm never getting a job in this district.*




*Just kidding. No one got hurt and nothing was damaged... I still have a chance. Maybe. They just won't ever let me supervise a grill.

When Things Don't Go Our Way

I've been long-term subbing for about three months now, and the school year is almost over. These three months have been... wow. I've learned so much about my teaching style- my strengths, my weaknesses. I've been so frustrated with my students, I've been so proud of them, I've hurt for them, and I've laughed with them. These three months have stretched me and grown me. My time as a high school English teacher is quickly coming to an end. Sixteen more school days with my terrible, wonderful high school students... and then what?

To be completely honest, I'm not sure.

I feel a little like I'm back to square one. My plan for the year was to sub, and hope that a full-time position came available soon. The long-term subbing job was a big surprise and a wonderful blessing, and I thought, as we Christians (or at least me-Christian) tend to do:

Well! God's opening a door! I'll get my name out there, do a great job subbing, have an awesome experience to add to my resume... God's got a full-time job for me soon!

We're three weeks to the end of school... and there are no job openings. In any of the districts nearby. 

And at first, I was confused. I mean, God's opened this door for me- now what? Isn't it His will that I teach? Isn't that what this long-term subbing experience was supposed to show me? Then I got crabby. I did all this work, adapted lessons to fit the needs of my students, stayed up late grading, worked my tushy off to get done with my college classes so I get my full license... for what? After all this, doesn't God want me in a teaching job??

Maybe not. Maybe this great experience was just that- a great experience. Maybe I was supposed to do the stretching and the growing, but a full-time job isn't the plan for me, or at least it's not the plan for right now.

And I have to be okay with that. Things don't always go my way, as much as I wish they would! In the midst of this time, I have to believe that God's plan is bigger and better than my own, that He's got it under control.

Five Things on Friday

Today was.. bleh. You know those days? I can't be the only one who has those. To combat the "blehs," here's a list of five things I love today.

1. The robins. About two weeks ago, robins started showing up- a lovely and hopeful sign of spring. Cut to two weeks later, with four inches of snow on the ground. As the snow fell yesterday, the robins starting hopping around, looking horribly confused. While I feel a little bad for these poor, cold, little birds, it's so funny to watch them standing under the deck and in the tire tracks to stay out of the snow. Poor robins.

2. My husband. Last night, he parked our truck in his maintenance shop so the melting snow didn't flood our garage, but instead ran down the fancy drains in the shop floor. Because there was that much snow on the truck. Anyways, this morning, I thought I'd have to hike over to the shop so I could take the truck to school. I put on my snow boots and got ready to start my trek... and saw the truck in the driveway. My sweet, sweet husband, after getting up before 6 to start clearing snow, went and brought the truck from the shop. (He's #2, because while he's wonderful and sweet, he's not quite as cute as the robins).

3. Camp. We don't have internet at our new house yet, so I've been heading over to the camp office building to do my online homework. It's like, the best thing ever. There are always interesting and caring people around saying things like, "We found another counselor for this weekend! Yes! Oh, let's pray," and singing or humming all the time. It's lovely.

4. Having a mantle. The new house (which isn't at all new, just new to us) is so full of character and quirks. I just love it. And... the house has a fireplace! We can't use it, at the moment, because it isn't up to code, but I'm just so excited to have a mantle to decorate for Christmas next year. <Sigh> So far away....

5. Wool socks. While I never thought I'd be saying this in mid-April, wool socks are the best. So cozy, so warm.