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Tuesday, November 11, 2014

Expectations: Thank God for Second Chances

Growing up, I had an image of how my life was going to go. How my marriage would look.

I would get up in the morning in the city, kiss my 5'10" husband good-bye as he headed to the office, briefcase in hand. We'd come home from work and he'd tell me about his day, with clients or business partners or the board or something to do with architecture... something "office-y." We'd have a pleasant life.

To put it simply, none of that happened.

My marriage looks completely different than I expected.

I get up in the morning to the sound of wild turkeys in the woods near my house. I kiss my 6'5" husband good-bye as he heads to the shop, and then we see each other again about 5 minutes later at morning prayer... because we work together. He tells me about his day, with Roto-Rooters and sockets and wrenches and boat hoists that needed a new cable.

And I don't have a pleasant life. I have an amazing, vibrant life.

See, I had expectations. Nothing about my marriage meets my old expectations. My marriage is nothing that I expected; it's more than I could ever have dreamed. 

God had more in store for me.

I think so many of us have lists of what we are looking for in a relationship. Whether the list is a mental one or a physical piece of paper, we have expectations. Some of these expectations are positive and often pretty obvious: we expect honesty, we expect loyalty. They might not even make "the list" because they're just a given. But then there are other expectations.

The trouble is, by asking people to measure up to our lists of qualities and qualifications, we miss out on amazing opportunities, on getting to know amazing people.

Zeke asked me to the prom when we were in high school.

I said no.

Because he didn't match my list.

Thank God for second chances.

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