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Monday, July 21, 2014

Bloom: Stop Waiting, Start Growing

Going from single to married is life changing; so much so that the Bible describes it as two people becoming one. It's an irreversible change of identity.

I think it's easy for the "un-marrieds" and the "marrieds" to keep to themselves. Of course, I don't think that's really the best thing, but we'll cover that another time.

See, attached or unattached, we have a lot that we can learn. We have so very much growing to do. The thing is, I've found that there are so many more wonderful resources for women with a gold band on their finger. What about the ones whose ring finger is bare?

Well, we've talked about that glorious transition time (which can be frenzied and disjointed, or intentional and purposeful) in a long, drawn out bunch of posts.

But what about you?

You, who aren't married? You, who aren't engaged? You, who aren't even doing that "dating" thing just now?

Where's the advice for you?

That's the trouble, really. There isn't much. And here's the thing. To be healthy in relationships, to someday be healthy in a marriage, you first need to be spiritually healthy in you. And if you're not called to marriage, then you of course still need to be growing and healthy spiritually.

I know so many young ladies out there who are focused on getting married, on dating, on finding the perfect man. They've been praying for him for years. I'm not saying that's a bad thing- but I've noticed that when we focus on our Mr. Right, we forget ourselves. We're so focused on the external that we don't grow internally.

Or, (as in my case, but you'll hear about that later) you find yourself in a series of negative dating relationships that warp your sense of self. You miss the warning signs, or you make decisions that harm yourself or others. We kill relationships because we've cut ourselves off from truth, and as a result, we're wounded and scarred, or we think we need that other person to push us towards growth. And that's simply not true. 

Start growing now. Find your way now. Become the woman God intended you to be now.

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In August, we'll be switching focus from intentional engagement to a purposeful time of growing while single, as well as some advice for those ladies doing that thing called "dating." I've got some great posts lined up, and some awesome guest bloggers sharing their perspectives.

Stay tuned for those posts in August, okay?

And of course, you can follow me on Facebook or subscribe via e-mail to make sure that you don't miss this exciting new series! I'm really looking forward to it.

PS- No longer in that "dating" phase? Want to share your hard-earned, time tested wisdom with those who are? I'm still accepting a few more guest bloggers. If you'd like to be considered or you have a great idea of what to include, please shoot me an e-mail!

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